This morning, while walking Evie to school, I passed a women with long, long, hot pink acrylic toenails. Despite the fact that it was 42 degrees out, and windy, she was wearing flip flops, which is why I saw that long pink acrylic toenails. But then, she'd have to, because there is no way her feet would fit into ordinary shoes. Maybe she could swing those crazy barefoot running things if she cut the ends off the toes, but other than that, I'm guessing she's pretty much stuck with sandals.
There are a lot of...interesting...beauty treatments around here. I recently bought a groupon (my first) for a hair cut (which is tomorrow! Yay!) and now I get all sorts of offers in my inbox every morning.
For example, this morning I received this
Diamonds are a Pores Best Friend. Catchy. Further exploration revealed that this could also include ear candling. I could look up what that is, but I wont.
Many of the deals are for the standards. Haircuts, color, manicures. But they always throw in something interesting. Often something I didn't even know existed.
Japanese Eyelash Perm. Huh. Well, ok then. I've also seen listings for silk eyelash weaves and eyelash conditioning. Here I thought I was all fancy by putting on mascara most days.
There area also things I didn't really think would be a coupon type of thing. Like liposuction. 50% off Lipo, a deal at $9000. But only if you buy in the next ten minutes. Who spontaneously buys $9000 worth of liposuction? Or this. What is this actually?
20 units of Botox anyone? Organic airbrush tan? Body contorting treatment (with the tagline "those booty shorts aren't going to wear themselves").
On tax day they had a special "Taxes and Waxes" section. "This time get smooth after you get screwed." No kidding. That's what it said. Although I think my favorite was the couples colon irrigation session. Because that's what I want to do with Will, spend the day together, getting our colons cleaned out. Nothing says love like an enema, after all.
I thought I had it hard trying to decide whether or not to get my hair cut cut, or just trimmed, but there are folks out there who are trying to decide between Velashape treatments and Body Contorting, and they only have minutes left people!
What do you think, would you have your eyelashes permed? (Evey time I read these it makes me think of Parker Posey in You've Got Mail "If I ever get out of here, I'm getting my eyes lasered!")
Although, to be fair, I know this isn't just in New York. I vividly remember watching a perky morning television show in Dublin where the host and the guest discussed the rise in popularity for a waxing treatment (for men) called the "Sack, back and crack." So. Yeah.
I think I'll stick with the haircut.