I'm usually a pretty upbeat person, glass half full and all that. But today I can't stop thinking about something I read this morning. A blog that I have, very occasionally, remembered to go read about a busy mother of four, Home/Work is one of the blogs on Babble.com. I remember reading some time ago of her revelation that her oldest child was addicted to drugs, today I read that he had recently died. That, coupled with the fact that my bookclub discussed Methland last night and all the horrors that go with that have me thinking of all the worst "what-if's" a parent can think.
I remember my father once told me that he and my mom thought long and hard about having children at all. About what kind of world their kids would have to grow up in, and whether it was right to bring more kids into such a messed up time. Thankfully they decided to take that risk, and probably because they were so concerned about things in the first place, I was sheltered in all the right ways and haven't really been exposed to many of the problems that my parents so feared.
I have to confess that those kind of thoughts didn't trouble me when Will and I decided to have kids. We were blissfully ignorant of most of the worlds troubles, I think in many ways we still are. Which is why, hearing a story like the one on Home/Work seems doubly devastating to me. An ordinary family, a child who was loved and raised in a happy, seemingly so from what I've read, home, and yet... I can't stop thinking about it. And wanting to hug the kids. Wanting to tell them all the things they should not do. And also not wanting to tell them, because I don't want them to know yet, all the horrible things out there. I want them to be ignorant. But I want them to be prepared. I suppose it's a dilemma that we all face. And to be frank, I'm no where near knowing what to take away from this, this horrible thing. Or what I want to tell them, and not tell them, to keep them safe.
Anyway, this is not my usual thing but, if you feel compelled, please keep this family in your thoughts. And hug your kids a little tighter. Because, well, just because.